Elsa Bloodstone

“This is all your fault, Wade,” Elsa Bloodstone said with a scowl as she examined the broken glass and bullet shells littering the corridors of the Collector’s Gallery.

“Funny,” Deadpool said, his voice labored, “I was just about to say the same thing to you.”

“Me?” Elsa said, barely holding back an angry laugh. “You’re the one who set loose some of the deadliest creatures in the known universe, luv.”

“Well, sure,” Deadpool sheepishly admitted. “That part’s definitely on me. But I had a good reason!”

“Creating a diversion so that your ‘ex-girlfriend’ and her husband can steal a priceless artifact from our employer’s private gallery is not a good reason,” Elsa replied.

“It is if you’re me,” Deadpool said with a shrug. “Of course, I can come up with a good explanation for almost all of my most misguided escapades… except maybe this one…”

Deadpool looked down at the tiny Broodling nestled in his arms. The insectoid alien may have appeared terrifying at first glance, but it clearly meant no harm. In fact, it seemed completely enamored with the red-and-black-clad mercenary holding it. And he knew exactly why…

***

Moments earlier, just before Elsa had reached the heart of the chaos in the Collector’s Gallery, Deadpool had accidentally gotten himself skewered by the tail of a vicious Brood Queen. As he’d learned from reading decades worth of X-Men comics, a Brood Queen can implant an embryo inside of the abdomen of its victim. In most cases, the embryo’s cells rapidly replace the original cells of the host, essentially transforming them into a new Broodling. But Deadpool’s hyperactive healing factor had caused the process to take a far-less-traditional turn. Unable to replace his cells and transform him into a Broodling, the embryo instead seemed to be growing inside of Deadpool at an alarming rate.

Deadpool’s entire stomach was undulating as if the creature inside of him was desperately trying to claw its way out. Fortunately for him, Elsa was on the scene. Unfortunately, however, she wasn’t terribly fond of her partner and seemed far more focused on making sure that the Brood Queen didn’t harm anyone else. To be fair, hunting monsters was her job… but still…

Elsa leapt into the shadowy corner of the Collector’s Gallery where the Brood Queen was hiding. Deadpool was impressed as she effortlessly unloaded a hail of concussive blasts from her shotgun, causing the Brood Queen to squeal in pain. With a quick slash of its talons, the wounded alien knocked Elsa back, sending her flying down the gallery corridor and into the glass wall of an empty display case.

Deadpool knew that Elsa couldn’t face this threat alone, but he was in no condition to help. As if things didn’t look grim enough, that’s exactly when a giant red dinosaur — one of the many captive creatures that Deadpool had unleashed during his ill-advised escape assist — stormed down the corridor directly towards Elsa.. And it did not seem thrilled.

Apparently, though, Elsa had encountered dozens of species of dinosaurs during her childhood while on family vacations to the Savage Land, so she knew exactly how to tame these ferocious beasts. Just when it looked as if the dinosaur was about to swallow her whole, Elsa gracefully leapt onto its back, mounting it like a steed and guiding it toward the Brood Queen. The Brood Queen prepared to attack, but Elsa and her chaotic companion moved with a speed and power that the alien simply couldn’t rival. With a swift chomp of the dinosaur’s mighty jaw, the Brood Queen was flung through the sky before collapsing unconscious, leaving Elsa to deal with something even more disturbing.

Elsa returned her attention to Deadpool, who was clutching his distended belly in tremendous pain. Even though they didn’t always see eye-to-eye, Deadpool knew that Elsa wasn’t going to let him die. Or at least that’s what he thought… until she pulled out a huge ceremonial dagger! Deadpool instantly passed out.

When he regained consciousness, Deadpool saw a tiny Broodling skittering across the gallery floor as it let out a high-pitched squeal. Elsa had drawn her somber steel shotgun, expecting the hatchling to instinctively defend its injured mother. But Deadpool begged Elsa not to shoot. As soon as the creature heard Deadpool’s voice, it scampered back to the disoriented mercenary and nuzzled up against him, comforting its “father” as he healed from the physical and emotional trauma he had just experienced.

This day had taken yet another turn that neither Deadpool nor Elsa ever would have expected… and it wouldn’t be the last…

***

“Wade? Are you okay?” Elsa asked the unusually silent Deadpool.

“Oh, yeah. Sorry,” Deadpool said, snapping out of his haze. “I was just having a quick flashback for the kids who didn’t read the Gallery Cards.”

“Of course you were…” Elsa said, clearly annoyed by Deadpool’s nonsensical explanation. “Even more proof that I should’ve left you to die after what you pulled here.”

“You know I didn’t have a choice,” Deadpool insisted. “Like you said, Rogue got herself into some deep trouble. And she used to be my boo. I couldn’t let the Collector hurt her.”

“So, that means you actually do have a soul!” Elsa said, a tinge of surprise in her voice. “After all of the innocent beings you gathered up for the Collector to put on display, I wasn’t so sure…”

“Hey! I was saving them from their dying timelines, lady!” Deadpool exclaimed. “If I didn’t bring ‘em here, they were just gonna vanish along with their home realities! I was actually doing something noble, thank you very much. Unlike some of us, who just spend their lives slaughtering monsters to impress their daddies!”

“My father trained me to survive,” Elsa snapped back. “And it was a bloody good thing he did. Because when my reality fell apart, I had to fight my way across entire continents overtaken by angry beasties. And nobody showed up in a magic school bus to save me!”

“You weren’t on my route,” Deadpool said in a failed attempt to break the rising tension.

“But here’s the thing,” Elsa continued. “My father was cold and cruel. He devoted every waking moment to eliminating supernatural threats. And I became just like him, for better or for worse… At least for a while…”

“Wait! Are you gonna have a flashback now, too?” Deadpool asked, excited. “Sweet!”

But Elsa never heard Deadpool’s words. Her mind had already drifted back to her own timeline, and the strange journey that had eventually led her here…

***

When Elsa’s timeline collapsed, all hell broke loose, though hells was more apropos. At first, she spent her days fighting tirelessly against endless hordes of monsters and demons that had been unleashed as part of an epic war between ancient gods. But she soon discovered that there were far too many monsters on the prowl for even a seasoned hunter like herself to handle alone. For the first time in her long life, the creatures of the night were winning the battle, and the hunter was becoming the hunted. So Elsa retreated to Bloodstone Manor. Elsa and her brother Cullen had been the only two residing there since their father’s death. And Cullen had mostly kept to himself since he became unwillingly soul-bonded to a vicious extra-dimensional parasite called the Glartrox. While tending to Cullen, whose resistance to Glartrox was steadily weakening, Elsa kept scouring her father’s journals for any possible advantage that might help her eliminate the creatures overtaking her reality. Little did she expect that the greatest advantage of all would one day come knocking at her door.

He arrived at the main gate of Bloodstone Manor dirty and disheveled. But it was instantly clear to Elsa, even in his unkempt state, that this was more than just a man. He said he was an outsider — banished from his home by his brother — who needed shelter until he could recover from his wounds and regain his strength. He claimed that a mutual friend, Bruce Banner, had sent him to Bloodstone Manor, knowing that its owners would offer him safe haven. Elsa took the stranger in. After all, though she had hunted the Hulk long ago, she had come to trust Banner and the small network of surviving heroes he had cultivated.

As the stranger began to recover, Elsa soon realized who he truly was. She had read all about him in her father’s journals. Thor Odinson. The Asgardian God of Thunder. She knew Thor would be a valuable ally in her quest to purge the world of monsters. He immediately proved Elsa correct when he offered to help her sever the connection between Cullen and the Glartrox. He claimed that he too had a younger brother who he would protect at any cost, no matter how sinister his sibling’s actions might be.

Elsa immediately accepted Thor’s offer. For far too long, the Glartrox had fed on Cullen’s negative emotions and caused the poor boy unspeakable strife. Channeling the Odinforce that remained within him, Thor broke the parasitic bond, freeing Cullen from the pain he had shouldered for so many years. But the Glartrox was not about to go hungry. It was determined to find a new host… but before it could attach itself to Elsa, she trapped it within Mordred’s Causeway. It was a struggle controlling the beast at first, but Elsa would soon discover that the Glartrox was just as happy feeding on the fear of her enemies as it had been feeding on Cullen’s rage and self-doubt.

Once Thor’s strength was fully restored, Elsa expected him to take his leave. But after seeing the state of his beloved Midgard, Thor instead decided to repay Elsa’s hospitality by helping her map out what was left of her world — and smiting every savage beast along the way!

Together, Elsa and Thor wandered the globe, charting the wastelands and slaying all monsters in their path. But even with a god and a Glartrox by her side, not every battle ended in glorious victory.

When the duo encountered two demons locked in battle near a small European village, they did what they believed was right and killed them both. Elsa was sure they'd saved the townsfolk from a gruesome fate. But what she didn’t know was that one of those demons had been protecting the village from its murderous kin. When she and Thor passed through the village again weeks later, they found it in ruins. Not a single survivor. The thunder god placed his massive hand on her back as she stared in silence. The two beings cursed to outlive most were a comfort to one another, each learning valuable lessons along the way. For Elsa, that lesson went against everything her father had ever taught her: Just like people, not all monsters are the same. They’re not all bad. And they don’t all deserve to die.

Elsa had always believed that the Glartrox was a curse. But ultimately, it turned out to be a blessing in disguise. If given the chance, she wondered, could other creatures that she would have once slaughtered without a moment’s hesitation prove worthy of a second chance as well…? It was a question that would shake her to her very core — one that would change not only her fate, but the fate of the creatures she had sworn to hunt…

***

“That was an emotional rollercoaster!” Deadpool exclaimed, as if he was somehow aware of the memories that had just flooded Elsa’s mind. “All that awesome action followed by important life lessons — just like a cartoon from the ‘80s! Remember kids: Drink your milk, stay in school, and don’t do drugs!”

Elsa stared at Deadpool, unsure of how to respond to his incoherent ramblings. But as she watched the Broodling coo affectionately in his arms, she reminded herself of what her journey had taught her.

“Not all monsters are bad.” Elsa said quietly.

“Are you talking about him?” Deadpool asked, pointing to the little Brood with his free hand, “Or me…?”

“Both,” Elsa replied, her grim demeanor beginning to soften.

Suddenly, the alien’s chirps and squeals started to form into what sounded like words.

“Daaaad… Poooool…” it seemed to growl. Deadpool squealed with delight and hugged the Broodling tighter.

“You’re gonna need a name, little guy!” Deadpool said. “I’m thinking Broodpool. Or maybe Wade Junior.”

“More importantly,” Elsa chimed in, “it’s going to need a home. So are all of the creatures that you set free.”

“That’s a good point,” Deadpool said. “We can’t just let the Collector put ‘em back into cages. Do you happen to work with any monster rescue shelters?”

“The human world has no idea what to do with their kind,” Elsa said. “It’ll take someone special to claim responsibility and make sure that they have what they need. Not just to survive, but to thrive. Someone to unite them. To lead them and protect them. And to teach them how to protect themselves from a world that hates and fears them.”

“You know that’s the X-Men’s tagline, right?” Deadpool asked. “But I get your point. And it’s a good thing you’re here, guv’nor, ‘cause you’re the perfect girl for the job!”

“Actually,” Elsa responded, “I had someone else in mind.”

“Really?” Deadpool said, looking frantically around the room for whoever Elsa might be talking about. “I’m not sure the telepathic space dog is up for that kinda pressure…”

“I meant you, Wade,” Elsa said, much to Deadpool’s surprise. “I can’t think of anyone else in the world who could better understand such a group of outsiders and misfits.”

“Thanks… I think…” Deadpool said. “But I can barely take care of myself. How am I supposed to rule some sort of Monster Kingdom?”

“The only way any of us could,” Elsa responded earnestly. “One day at a time.”

“And if they try to eat me?” Deadpool asked.

“I wouldn’t blame them,” Elsa jested. “But even so, it’s probably not anything personal. Some monsters just need a little extra understanding.”

“Do you think I could be the one to give them that?” Deadpool asked.

“That’s the hope,” Elsa said. “It won’t be easy. After all, there are still days the Glartrox gives in to its darkest impulses…”

“Don’t we all…” Deadpool agreed.

“…but if you give a monster the chance to make the right choice, I bet you’ll be surprised by how things turn out.”

“You’re talking about them and me again, aren’t ya?” Deadpool asked.

“You’d better believe it, luv,” Elsa replied with a cheeky grin.

“You know what?” Deadpool said, looking at the baby Broodling wriggling in his arms. “For the first time in a long time, I think I actually do.”