BFFFs
“Can you believe it, Tippy?” Squirrel Girl asked, her voice rising to a high pitched squeal. “We got invited to Krakoa for the Hellfire Gala! It’s only, like, the most important event of the year… Whatever year this is…”
Just a few days ago, Doreen Green — the Unbeatable Squirrel Girl — and her trusty rodent sidekick Tippy-Toe were fighting for their lives in a New York City that had been thrust into eternal darkness and infested with vampires. So getting whisked away through some sort of magic portal to a living Mutant island 75 years in the future wasn’t exactly on her Bingo card. But she wasn’t complaining. After the fight against Dracula, she and her squirrel friends were in desperate need of a vacation. And there was no better place to kick back and relax than on a tropical island in the middle of the Pacific Ocean!
“You like the new outfit?” Squirrel Girl asked with a smile, giving a twirl as she showed off her festive beachy look. “I know everyone else is getting all gussied up for the Gala tonight, but I thought some casual wear was more my style.”
Tippy-Toe was about to chirp in agreement, but instead she let out a squeal of horror, skittering up Squirrel Girl’s body to perch safely on her best friend’s shoulder.
“What’s wrong, Tippy?” Squirrel Girl asked, looking around to find the source of the commotion. Suddenly, she saw it — a strange dog-like creature bounding down the beach toward her at top speed. But this was no normal dog. Its skin was shiny silver and its alien features made it look equal parts menacing and adorable.
“No!” a voice yelled from afar. “Bad Warwolf!”
Squirrel Girl looked down the beach further to see her friend Rocket Raccoon hurriedly chasing after the strange alien dog.
“Sorry about that,” Rocket said as he got closer, “I was takin’ Amazing Baby here for a walk and he got away. Didn’t mean to scare your bushy-tailed pal.”
“Tippy will be fine,” Squirrel Girl said, reaching down to pet Amazing Baby on the top of his smooth silver head. “And this little fella was just a bit overexcited, wasn’t he?”
“Who can blame him?” Rocket said. “With all we’ve been through, savin’ the universe and whatnot, we finally get to reap the rewards in paradise! I think we all needed a getaway like this after that vampire nonsense in New York. It’s a nice change of pace not havin’ someone constantly tryin’ to take a bite outta us!”
“MRRRRR!” a loud voice exclaimed, right on cue.
The heroes turned to see a strange creature leaping out of the ocean waves toward them, its giant jaws wide open and its sharp fangs flashing in the summer sun. As Tippy-Toe and Amazing Baby yelped and ran at full speed into the Krakoan jungle, Squirrel Girl and Rocket instinctively got into battle positions, ready to fend off the bounding beast. Fortunately, before any punches could be thrown, they realized that this wasn’t some menacing Mutant monster that lurked off the Krakoan coast. It was their new friend, Jeff the Land Shark!
“MRRRRRR!” Jeff squealed with joy as he landed on his tiny legs between Rocket and Squirrel Girl.
“I’m happy to see you too, Jeffy,” Squirrel Girl said. “Though you gave Tippy and Rocket’s pup quite the scare.”
“We should probably go find ‘em before they get into any more trouble,” Rocket said.
“How about you take the lead, Jeff?” Squirrel Girl asked, knowing that the little shark had plenty of experience chasing after her squirrel pals.
“MRR!” Jeff proudly responded, sniffing the ground as he followed Tippy-Toe’s trail into the lush green vegetation just beyond the beach. Squirrel Girl and Rocket stayed close behind their amphibious ally.
After chasing Jeff through the dense undergrowth for several minutes, Squirrel Girl and Rocket found themselves entering a clearing.
“There you are, Tippy,” Squirrel Girl said as she caught sight of her companion. “I was worried you’d gotten lost, or eaten, or —”
Squirrel Girl paused as she realized how still and silent Tippy-Toe and Amazing Baby were standing. Her gaze drifted over to the center of the clearing, where she saw a heartbreaking sight. There was her Mutant ally, Psylocke, kneeling on the ground. In her arms, she gently cradled the body of what looked to be a very old wolf. It was clear the creature was close to the end of its days.
“Are… are you okay, Sai…?” Squirrel Girl asked, putting a hand on Psylocke’s shoulder.
“I am,” Psylocke responded. “But Logan is not…”
“Logan…?” Squirrel Girl asked, confused. When she heard that name, she instantly thought of the X-Man known as Wolverine. But she soon realized that Psylocke was talking about her ancient lupine friend.
“He was my best friend and most loyal companion,” Psylocke said, her gaze still fixed on the poor, old creature wrapped in her embrace. “Back in the world I came from, we hunted Oni side-by-side for many years. When the Collector ripped me from my timeline, I thought I would never see him again. But it seems Logan never gave up on finding me. I can see it in his memories. He found his way across time and space, chasing some strange man in red who had been sent to find me. Eventually, he picked up my scent again and followed it here to Krakoa.”
“By the shape he’s in, it looks like it took the poor thing centuries to find ya,” Rocket said.
“It did,” Psylocke confirmed. “His healing factor kept him alive all that time… but even his body has its limits, it seems…”
“You mean, he’s…” Squirrel Girl’s voice trembled. She couldn’t finish her thought before tears began to roll down her cheeks.
“Hai,” Psylocke said, confirming Squirrel Girl’s unspoken fear. “Now that Logan has finally found me, his mission is complete. His journey has come to an end. It is time for him to rest.”
Jeff approached Psylocke and gently nuzzled her, showing his dear friend some much needed support.
“A little rest is fine and dandy,” Rocket said, trying to keep composed, “but I ain’t gonna sit here and watch you lose a friend again just as soon as you found him. There’s gotta be somethin’ we can do.”
“Wait…” Squirrel Girl said, excitement returning to her voice. “I have an idea! When I’m not busy eatin’ nuts and kickin’ butts, I study computer science at Empire State University. And last semester, I wrote a paper on memory storage. But I’m not talking files and folders here. I’m talking about how real memories — like yours and mine — could theoretically be stored in a digital format and downloaded into a new body if something happened to us. And during my research, I found a Daily Bugle article by Ben Urich that claimed the citizens of Krakoa were already applying a similar process to make themselves all-but immortal.”
“The Resurrection Protocols,” Psylocke said quietly. “Magneto has spoken of them. But they are reserved only for Mutants.”
“Yeah, well, the computers at ESU are reserved only for students doing homework,” Squirrel Girl said with a shrug, “but that never stopped Tippy-Toe from playing solitaire on them.”
“The game you are playing is far beyond your scope of understanding,” a voice said from behind the gathered heroes. They turned to see Emma Frost entering the clearing in a luxurious gown. Her skin dazzled like a million diamonds.
“Try us,” Rocket taunted. “We may not look all sophisticated like you, lady, but when it comes to tech, there ain’t no one in the galaxy who can keep up with me.”
“Give us the chance, Ms. Frost,” Squirrel Girl said. “You obviously trusted us enough to invite us here tonight. Let us prove to you that it was the right choice by letting us help your friend.”
Emma looked over at Psylocke, whose head was hung low. Logan’s breath was growing shallower by the second.
“Fine,” Emma said, showing a rare moment of compassion. “But you’ll need to act fast. That mutt doesn’t have much life left in him. And do me a favor…”
“Anything!” Squirrel Girl cried, trying to restrain herself from wrapping Emma in a giant hug.
“Cerebro was designed to store one current copy of each Mutant’s memory profile,” Emma said. “Now that Krakoa has started to welcome more and more Mutants from other realities, I had Forge create partitions in Cerebro’s memory storage. That way, the alternate versions of our allies won’t accidentally overwrite each other. All of that to say, if you do manage to bring back Logan, please make sure it’s the right one. The last thing I need is a wolf with the personality of Wolverine running loose on the island during my Gala.”
“We’ll be careful,” Squirrel Girl promised. “You have our word!”
“Then you have my blessing,” Emma responded. A moment of contented silence passed before Emma snapped, “Well…? What are you waiting for? Let’s go already... before I change my mind!”
As Emma turned to exit the clearing, she put a hand to her temple and momentarily switched out of her diamond form so that she could use her telepathic abilities. In a flash, Squirrel Girl, Rocket, and Jeff all knew exactly where they had to go and what they had to do.
Squirrel Girl and Tippy-Toe would accompany Emma to the Cradle, where Cerebro was stored. From there, Emma would be able to initiate a telepathic upload of Logan’s memories into the system’s neural network while Squirrel Girl created an algorithm to route the data to the proper partition.
Meanwhile, Rocket and Amazing Baby would find Groot and lead him to the Grove, where he could have a plant-to-plant chat with Krakoa about using its Seedlings — tiny Krakoan creatures that had absorbed traces of the powers of the many powerful Mutants lost to the Timestream Entanglement — to bend the Resurrection Protocols and grow a special non-Mutant body for the lupine Logan...
Finally, Jeff would stay with his dear friend Psylocke to comfort her as Logan made his transition from one life to the next.
As Squirrel Girl, Rocket, and their companions made their way out of the clearing, Psylocke called after them.
“Where I come from,” she said, “there are animal spirits known as Shugorei. I have forged many friendships with these majestic guardians. I am glad to count you among them. We may come from different worlds, but we are like family now.”
“That means Logan is family, too,” Squirrel Girl said, “and we won’t let him — or you — down.”
With that, the heroes went their separate ways, each equally determined to save Psylocke’s furry friend.
LATER THAT NIGHT
As the Hellfire Gala’s opening ceremonies finally began, Psylocke stood quietly at the edge of the festivities. Her heart was still heavy from the loss of her beloved Logan, who had silently passed away in her arms hours earlier. And while she knew that her new friends had done their best to save her companion, there was still no word on whether or not their attempts had been met with success.
Suddenly, a ruckus broke out amongst the crowd as Jeff the Land Shark bounded across the dance floor, weaving his way between the legs of partygoers. Jeff was followed closely by Tippy-Toe and Amazing Baby, who both chittered with excitement. Behind them, much to Psylocke’s delight and amazement, stood Logan. The old wolf looked as young and spry as he had been back when he and his master were first separated. Logan lunged forward, racing through the crowd and leaping into Psylocke’s eager arms. For the first time anyone who knew her could remember, the solemn warrior couldn’t help but smile.
“Well, whaddya know?” Rocket said with a smile. “We did it!”
“We sure did, buddy,” Squirrel Girl replied. “We make a pretty good team, you and me! Too bad we’ve already got partners!”
“True…” Rocket said, extending a paw to Squirrel Girl and leading her toward the dance floor, “but I’m sure mine wouldn’t mind if I switched things up for just one dance.”
“Not in those outfits,” Emma Frost said sternly as she passed by. The two heroes stopped cold in their tracks, looking down at their vacation attire and realizing just how out of place they were amongst the other exquisitely-dressed attendees.
“How about we just hit the beach instead,” Squirrel Girl suggested. “We could grab our BFFFs and have a party of our own.”
“I like how you think, lady,” Rocket agreed. “I’ve never been much for fancy shindigs anyway.”
As they called for Tippy-Toe, Amazing Baby, and Jeff to join them, Squirrel Girl took one last long look around the room.
“You sure they’ll be okay without us?” she asked Rocket.
“Of course,” Rocket replied confidently. “These jerks don’t need us. Just look at how many heroes are here…”
As they exited the Hellfire Gala, Squirrel Girl and Rocket were so excited to get back to the beach that they failed to notice the strange techno-organic patterns that had begun to appear on the foliage bordering one of the Krakoan gateways.
“…what could possibly go wrong?”